Account for the relationship as it is now
Use a tone that fits the present relationship, not the closeness, authority, or access that existed in the past. For a message about how to end a roommate arrangement respectfully, use this factual base: state the role, agreement, effective date, unfinished work, property, access, and any transition obligation.
Ask without assigning an obligation
Explain what you hope for while making decline, delay, or a different format genuinely acceptable. Give a clear ending, complete the required handoff, and name what support you can realistically provide. Make the immediate next step clear enough that the recipient can answer without reconstructing the entire history.
Keep the ending honest
Do not disappear, promise indefinite availability, or use the ending to relitigate every grievance. Follow contracts, safeguarding, data access, employment, custody, and legal requirements before the role ends. Avoid future promises, guilt, flattery, or nostalgia that imply the recipient owes you access.