Start with the part that is verifiable
Separate the event you can describe from the motive or reaction you are guessing. For a message about how to invite an estranged relative to your wedding, use this factual base: give the event, date, location, relevant history, and what kind of contact the invitation involves.
Make one answerable request
Give the recipient one concrete question or next step instead of several emotional jobs at once. Offer a simple way to accept, decline, ask a practical question, or choose a lower-contact option. Make the immediate next step clear enough that the recipient can answer without reconstructing the entire history.
Leave the recipient in control
Do not announce their attendance, use relatives to persuade them, or make a public gesture before they agree. Respect no-contact, venue safety, custody, and legal restrictions even when the event feels important. A clear message remains useful even when the answer is no or no answer arrives.