Rebuild the missing context
Assume the recipient will not remember every date, promise, or earlier conversation. For a message about how to support a close friend through divorce, use this factual base: acknowledge the loss as they describe it and notice the immediate housing, childcare, work, or social impact.
Say what needs to happen next
State the decision, information, or practical action you need and include a real deadline only when one exists. Offer one practical task or a form of company that does not require them to retell the story. Make the immediate next step clear enough that the recipient can answer without reconstructing the entire history.
Avoid making urgency into pressure
Do not attack the ex, push dating, demand details, or share the news before they are ready. For abuse, stalking, housing danger, child risk, self-harm, or immediate danger, connect them with specialist or emergency support. Do not make the other person responsible for reducing the discomfort that prompted you to write.