Recognize what makes this moment difficult
Acknowledge the event directly without turning it into a lesson, comparison, prediction, or silver lining. For a message about how to support someone grieving a grandparent, use this factual base: use the person's name and relationship when known, and avoid details the family has not shared publicly.
Offer support that can be accepted
Offer one specific form of practical or emotional support and make clear that no immediate reply is needed. Offer one concrete form of help and remove any expectation of an immediate response. Make the immediate next step clear enough that the recipient can answer without reconstructing the entire history.
Follow their pace rather than yours
Do not say everything happens for a reason, demand strength, or center your own similar loss. For immediate risk, traumatic circumstances, or a person unable to stay safe, use local crisis or emergency support. The recipient decides whether they want conversation, ordinary company, practical help, professional support, or quiet.